Monday, March 27, 2006

Fantasy Baseball

Well tonight was the draft for the fantasy baseball league I started for members of Full Tilt Forum. The league's homepage can be found here: FTF Fantasy Baseball.

Here is the team I drafted, I feel pretty good about my draft. I had the 6th pick which put me in the middle each round, and that's generally a good pick to have.

Starting Lineup

  • C Javy Lopez-Baltimore Orioles
  • 1B Derrek Lee-Chicago Cubs (If I had to have at a Cub on my team, he's the one I want)
  • 2B Robinson Cano-New York Yankees
  • 3B Adrian Beltre-Seattle Mariners
  • SS Bill Hall-Milwaukee Brewers
  • OF Bobby Abreu-Philadelphia Phillies
  • OF Grady Sizemore-Cleveland Indians
  • OF Hideki Matsui-New York Yankees
  • Util Jim Edmonds-St. Louis Cardinals


  • OF David Dellucci-Texas Rangers
  • OF Alex Rios-Toronto Blue Jays
  • 1B Prince Fielder-Milwaukee Brewers
  • 3B Joe Crede-Chicago White Sox

Starting Pitchers

  • Mark Buehrle-Chicago White Sox
  • Barry Zito-Oakland Athletics
  • Zack Duke-Pittsburgh Pirates
  • Javier Vazquez-Chicago White Sox
  • Mike Mussina-New York Yankees


  • Scot Shields-Anaheim Angels
  • Jonathon Papelbon-Boston Red Sox
  • Brad Lidge-Houston Astros

Good luck me.

Keepin It Real Since 1980,


Pulp Fiction Meets Jurassic Park

Get your tickets now!!!!!!

Snakes on a Plane

Friday, March 24, 2006

Jump Around!

Ok, well I don't know what everybody's plans are this weekend but if you're in the Chicago area Saturday night I'm officially inviting you to a party with the new House of Pain.

Diamonds are a girl's best friend

Come join Kevin, Brian, and Marty as they christen their new Super Manly and Cool Bachelor Pad of The Future with a wee get together. There will be beer. For more info, go
here. If somebody asks you who the hell you are just tell them The Leemer sent you.


  • Well thanks to all the free press it recieved (I'm still waiting for my check) in the last week its not surprising but more people tuned into South Park this week to see Chef die than ever.
  • Maybe this is why the Catholic Church doesn't allow it's Priests to marry. Murderous wives?......molesting small children?.....murderous wives?.....molesting small children? I'll take Screw em All(no I don't mean the small children) for $800 Alex.
  • Gotta love a country in which you can send thousands of kids to their deaths, but you kick one cat........
  • Say your young child runs away from home one day, where's the first place you look? 1,000 miles away, or down the street? SHE WAS TWO BLOCKS AWAY THE ENTIRE TIME!!!!!! How bad could they have wanted her back?
  • Well we're talking religion again so somebody must be dying. Islam? Christianity? I'll take Screw em All for $1000 Alex. Not to get too deep into it but when will mankind learn that religion is the main thing holding us back?
  • Oh those crazy Russians. Even when they aren't Commies they're still a pain in the ass.
  • Also since I think Jay Leno is absolutely brilliant, (outright lie)I just wanted to post this one cuz the headline made me laugh. Pagan poised for role on big league roster

Tuesday, March 21, 2006

The World In Picture Form

Well the weekend is over and it's back to our regularly scheduled life. Hope everybody had a good St. Patrick's Day. I was in heaven with my beer and my college basketball. Of course I spent the majority of my weekend at work.

So really between work, college basketball, and beer not much happened this weekend. I saw the newest episode of the Sopranos Sunday. What a very odd episode. Seeing Tony as anybody but the Tony Soprano mob boss was weird. Although the scene in which he was slapped by the monk killed me.

I really hope the coma doesn't last long, cuz the episode seemed disjointed. Whether that was the intent or not, it still doesn't work that well. I mean the episode was only like 45 minutes long, but watching it felt like 90 minutes. At least if the coma does last the show better move on to focusing on the power struggle that is no doubt about to ensue. That's where all the good stuff will be. I wonder if A.J. will really kill Junior. All I do know is that when he was talking to his dad in the hospital and said he would, I started to crack up. AJ thought he was Michael Corleone all of a sudden. Then 5 minutes later he's telling his mother he failed out of college. The kid gets practically no air time in the show, but whenever he does it's gold. For a few reasons really
  1. Robert Iler is really just not a very good actor, which leads to the unintentional comedy moments.
  2. His character is just a royal fuck up.

Imagine if AJ ran the family.

In other happenings I've seen quite a few movies over the last few weeks. Unfortunately I don't feel like rippin off paragraph upon paragraph of reviews. So what I'm going to do is just give quick little recaps of what I thought.

  1. Harold and Kumar Go To White Castle- This was one of those movies that the second I saw a commercial for it I knew I had to see it. Well I finally did last week. In a word, fantastic. I loved the entire thing. Neil Patrick Harris' role playing himself was easily one of the funniest things I've ever seen in my life. How he didn't win an Oscar, or even get nominated for one is simple one of the greatest crimes in American history. Also it was really nice to see Asians in a movie(John Cho and Kal Penn) that were more like the Asians I know. They aren't all just math nerds and terrorists. They are degenerate, lazy potheads too. Just like their American counterparts. I don't want to expose anybody here on my blog, but I have friends who are exactly like those two. That and they still got A's in school all the time. God damn Asians. Apparently this is supposed to be the first of a trilogy, with the next stop being Amsterdam. That movie can't get here quick enough, even though I know that in some way it will only ruin the entire thing. I don't care though. GRADE=A+
  2. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind- This movie was a lot like Sunday's Sopranos. Disjointed. It wasn't a bad movie at all, and I kinda liked the premise. I also liked Kristen Dunst dancing around in a tank top and panties bouncing on a bed. The movie though was just too back and forth between present, and past for me to ever develop a "connection" to it. I may have to watch it again at some point, it might help. Pry not. GRADE=C+
  3. Through the Fire-This was an ESPN documentary on current Portland Trailblazers point guard Sebastian Telfair. It followed him around during his senior year of high school in the project of Coney Island in New York. Telfair had long been a legend on the courts in Coney Island as he does have an amazing ability when it comes to basketball. The part of this documentary that stood out to me was how important basketball is to the African American culture, and in the community. It's really pretty simple. The philosophy is that being a good basketball player is the only way out. I mean it's not only his family that seems to depend on him. It's as if the entire community is counting on him. The scene in which he is drafted is particularly powerful. If anyone gets a chance to see this I recommend it to you. GRADE=B
  4. The Village-I just saw this on cable the other night. I generally like M. Night Shyamalammadingdong's movies, but this one wasn't very good. Opie's daughter (Bryce Dallas Howard) is good in it, but the rest of it just doesn't work. I mean in movies like Signs and The Sixth Sense at least the plots made sense. They also scared you a little. In this movie the plot is stupid, and you're never once scared. If you haven't seen it, I'm about to ruin it for you. There's a village in the middle of the woods. It's the 1800's, and nobody in the village can leave cuz there are creatures in the surrounding woods that will kill them. There is also no red in the village as the color attracts the creatures. (Red plays a role in every Shyamalan, I think that's how it's spelled, film) Well we then find out that the creatures aren't real at all, but that the town's elders made them up. Why? Cuz the world outside those trees is dangerous. Why? Cuz outside that forest it's 2004. The elders of the village formed it to escape the evils of our modern world. Money, violence, crime. A little utopia in the woods. Well not so joyful when the monsters come. The movie was just dumb, and then the end was the worst part. Watch it if you're extremely bored one night, and there are no good infomercials on. GRADE=D-

I'm gonna finish this entry with some links to some stories that may be interesting to anybody reading this blog.

Keepin It Real Since 1980,


Links of Interest

  • If you have a video iPod you may want to read this article. THIS is why I'm happy with my regular ass 20GB iPod that doesn't have video. Once these things get too advanced they kill themselves off slowly.
  • If you're like me and you enjoy(ed) the show Arrested Development you may wanna read this.
  • If you read this blog regularly you'll remember my rant on Isaac Hayes leaving South Park over religious reasons. It was due to an episode called Trapped in a Closet that made fun of Tom Cruise, John Travolta, R. Kelly, and the entire Church of Scientology. Well apparently Tom Cruise himself had the episode pulled last week when it was supposed to re-air. This led to South Park creators Matt Stone and Trey Parker taking out an ad in Variety magazine which said, and I quote, "So, Scientology, you may have won THIS battle, but the million-year war for earth has just begun! Temporarily anozinizing our episode will NOT stop us from keeping Thetans forever trapped in your pitiful man-bodies. Curses and drat! You have obstructed us for now, but your feeble bid to save humanity will fail! Hail Xenu!!!- Trey Parker and Matt Stone, servants of the dark lord Xenu." That's just classic. Anyway, what I'm really interested in is how the show will handle the entire situation. Here's a hint.

Friday, March 17, 2006

Happy St. Patricks Day

Happy St. Patty's Day everybody. May the beer, whiskey, and good times all flow freely for you.

Here's a picture of what I actually wore to work today:

Shirt by:Guiness

Hat by:The Raving Irishman

Beer by :Killian's

Beard by: Sleeping Through The Alarm

Well that's all for today, I'm off to watch basketball and get Irish. And remember, you don't have to be Irish to get drunk, but it helps.

Keepin It Real Since 1980,


Wednesday, March 15, 2006

Introducing:Prank Messenger

Welcome to a new feature of Keepin It Real Since 1980. I call it Prank Messenger. It's a simple premise. I get a random screen name, and send it ludicrous instant messages, whether on AIM, or Yahoo. Obviously I don't use my actual screen name, I create new ones. Anyway, if I can keep anyone around long enough, and the conversation is funny enough, I will post them here.

So without further ado, I present to you,


Starring:Tom Fornelli as John Alexander (Dialogue in Blue)
and introducing
Erica* as The Mark (Dialogue in Red)

*Names have been changed to protect my guilty ass

Hello there
How are you?
who are you?
my name is John. Are you busy?
Well I promise I won't be long
I just have a few questions
how did you get my screen name?
oh I have a list of names, it's part of my job
im'ing people is your job?
lol, no silly
I work for
What's gmd?
Giraffes Must Die
is this a joke?
you want to kill giraffes?
who is this?
my name is John Alexander, and I work for
We're a non profit organization interested in killing giraffes
they're smug
this is stupid
please, if you don't want to answer my questions, that's one thing
but to call my job stupid is an insult
it's ok. I'm used to it.
Americans are very uninformed about giraffes
in fact, the only giraffe most are familiar with is Geoffrey Giraffe of Toys R Us fame
I know him
not important. What IS important is that I spread the word about giraffes
They're evil fuckers
pardon my language
what's so evil about them?
ok, so theyre not evil in the Darth Vader sense, but they don't help much either
thats no reason to kill them
says you
who is this?
i told you, my name is John Alexander
seriously Tony?
no, this is John Alexander
this is not a joke
I don't believe you
well Ms.....mind if I ask your name?
Well Erica, who in the hell would just start talking to you about killing giraffes?
Well Tony sounds like a smart guy. I assure you again though, that I'm 100% serious
Well then why do you hate giraffes so much?
I think they're just incredibly smug
Well they're real tall right?
Taller than all the other animals?
so why do they need those antenna things on the top of their heads? Aren't they tall enough already!?
You know!
Their antenna!!! They only have them to make the rest of the animal kingdom feel inadequate!!
this ISN'T funny! Giraffes are destroying the self esteem of the once proud lion
the zebra
even the intelligent elephant
that rhymed!
It sure did, I'm also an incredible poet
do you know any giraffe poems?
I've written a few
tell me one
this is kinda on the spot
ok, I can't resist you Erica
There once was a giraffe named Eli
Who didn't know his place
He screamed "I don't wanna die!"
As I shot him in the face
was it that bad?
no it was great
seriously i loved it
thank you, it will be in my new book, available on our website
it's called Giraffes Must Die-A Collection of Prose in the Spirit of Girafficide
do I get a free copy if I donate?
no, there are no donations Erica
This is about your support, but not financial
then how?
Would you kill a giraffe?
Are you sure?
Yes I am
your what?
Don't you think?
I can't see you
I think its safe to say I've fallen in love with you
your insane
I am. I'm crazy in love with you
Like Beyonce with Jay Z
Let me be your Jigga Man
Erica, forget the giraffes, run away with me!
to Africa, we'll run with the cheetahs!!
I have work in the morning
ditch it!
I can't I have a presentation I have to do.
How about Friday?
sure, where do you live?
I'm in Seattle. I don't think this will work.
Damn you cruelest of fates
I have to go now John, it's been fun
ok Erica but before you go...
I love you
I love you too. Night.

Cool Honda Commercial

I got the link to this in an email from my dad. It's a pretty bad ass commercial. I'll include the message inside the email.

And you thought those people that set up roomfulls of dominos to knock over were amazing...

There are no computer graphics or digital tricks in the film. Everything you see really happened in real time exactly as you see it. The film took 606 takes. On the first 605 takes, something, usually very minor, didn't work. They would then have to set the whole thing up again. The crew spent weeks shooting night and day. By the time it was over, they were ready to change professions. The film cost six million dollars and took three months to complete including full engineering of the sequence. In addition, it's two minutes long so every time Honda airs the film on British television, they're shelling out enough dough to keep any one of us in clover for a lifetime. However, it is fast becoming the most downloaded advertisement in Internet history. Honda executives figure the ad will soon pay for itself simply in "free viewings" (Honda isn't paying a dime to have you watch this commercial!).

When the ad was pitched to senior executives, they signed off on it immediately without any hesitation - including the costs. There are six and only six hand-made Honda Accords in the world. To the horror of Honda engineers, the filmmakers disassembled two of them to make the film. Everything you see in the film (aside from the walls, floor, ramp, and complete Honda Accord) is parts from those two cars. The voiceover is Garrison Keillor. When the ad was shown to Honda executives, they liked it and commented on how amazing computer graphics have gotten. They fell off their chairs when they found out it was for real. Oh, and about those funky windshield wipers. On the new Accords, the windshield wipers have water sensors and are designed to start doing their thing automatically as soon as they become wet. It looks a bit weird in the commercial.

Honda Commercial

Hope you enjoy it.

Keepin It Real Since 1980,

Keepin It Real Music Collection-Complete Archive

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

But Who Will Make the Meatloaf?!


Go ahead, and read it. I can wait.

What a load of crap huh? I find what Matt Stone said to be dead on. Isaac Hayes had no problems when the show made fun of Christians, Muslims, Buddhists, Jews, or Atheists, but touch scientology........

Then accuse South Park of being bigoted? They make fun of everybody equally. Hell Hayes never had a problem with voicing a character who's only goal in life was to bed as many women as humanly possible. He never had a problem when his character explained what a clitoris was to an 8 year old boy.

Besides that episode where they do make fun of Scientology did nothing but animate Dianetics. It's not like they made anything up, they actually presented the mythology behind the religion. For Christ's sake I was raised Catholic and I didn't start to cry when they did a whole episode devoted to priests needing to get better at hiding their love affairs with little boys. This same episode also included an alien race present in the Vatican as Catholics, and God itself. In the form of a giant spider.

I laughed. It's a cartoon. People REALLY need to lighten up in this country. It's getting really damn ridiculous.

Oh well. I can't really stay mad at him. If he wants to leave, he wants to leave. I'm actually looking forward to how South Park will incorporate this into the new episodes. Is Chef gonna die of VD? (I think if they gave him AIDS he'd probably sue) Will he just get married and leave town? Will he have to avenge the death of his parents to the Loch Ness Monster? Personally I'm rooting for the latter. I'm gonna have to get in touch with Matt Stone and Trey Parker about this.

I'm inspired to start a new poll. I'm gonna put it over there in the Take Your Pick box. Who is your favorite South Park character of all time?


I'm about to start talking about the season premiere of The Sopranos, so if you haven't seen it, you may want to stop reading here.

First of all, if any of you think Tony is actually going to die, stop watching the show. I think it's fairly safe to say he'll be fine. My biggest clue (besided the fact killing him in the first episode make NO sense what so ever) is the fact that in previews you see Tony in episodes they didn't show last night. So unless the show takes the Lost route with all the crazy flashback seasons, I think it's safe to say 911 shows up just in time at Uncle Junior's.

Still I'm having trouble figuring out what was more disturbing, the 45 second hanging scene, or Janice (Aida Turturro) breastfeeding the baby.

I really didn't need to see either, but I must say the hanging scene looked REAL. Of course so did the breast feeding.

I also gotta say I'm thrilled that they just skipped through all the Tony/Carmela stuff. That story line just killed the last season and a half. I understood the reasoning behind it, but since they had to devote so much of each episode to it, the last few seasons lacked what people really want.


The action can't stop, Tony and Carmela's marriage is more soap opera, and if we wanted to watch soap operas we'd watch soap operas. I'm more interested in the business side of the family. The first episode is very promising though. It looks like this last (?) season will be one of the best, of course after waiting so long anything probably would have looked good at this point.

I saw a few other movies last week that I will review tomorrow or something. I need to go to work soon, and have to start getting ready.

Keepin It Real Since 1980,

Saturday, March 11, 2006

Treating Schizophrenia

Yesterday was a very odd day at work for me. I got punched in the balls, and I'm hearing voices. It's a tiny bit disconcerting.

We'll get to my balls later, and start with the voices. While I was at work yesterday on like 5 seperate
occasions I heard a voice. I would be working on something and then clear as day I would hear "Hey Tom." and I'd turn and look and nobody was there. The voice sounded like it was no more than 2 feet away from me. It was a female voice too. Anyway, it was completely freaking me out. It got to the point that Marianne walked up behing me and said "Hey Tom." but I didn't respond cuz I figured it was my imagination again. Finally when she was standing next to me she hit me on the shoulder, then I had to lie and say I didn't hear her. It's totally not believable, but it's better than saying "Sorry. There's this voice in my head that's been calling me all day, and I just figured you were it again."

Angel may have solved the problem though.

Angel was talking on the phone, so Jason and I decided to mess with him. That kid is always on the damn phone. So we were hitting the buttons and whispering sweet nothings into his ear while he was in conversation. You know 4th grade shit. Finally Angel swung at me, and I flinched. So I swung back at him, but he didn't flinch. That proved to be a problem, cuz his not flinching resulted in my connecting a right hook directly to his jaw. The shocked look on his face was absolutely priceless. I didn't hit him hard, but obviously Angel got pissed off. I was expecting to get punched in retaliation in like the chest or stomach or something.

Angel had other plans though.

Instead as soon as I put my guard down he went for my special area. I haven't been directly attacked by a person there since the 5th grade, when Andrea Weaver kneed me in the groin after we argued an out call at first base in a kickball game. Oddly enough I asked her out on a date about 2 weeks later, and she said yes. (The knee to the groin confirmed my belief that she liked me. Ah 5th grade. When women were easy to figure.) I don't remember what movie we saw, only that my mom dropped us off and I got no action.

Anyway, I'm not going to ask Angel out in 2 weeks. I did get incredibly pissed though. It was mostly just a mask to hide the insane amount of pain I was in. I told Angel if he ever wanted to fight like a man (he was the first NON female to ever attack me in the groin) he knew where to find me. I then went to find somewhere to sit down and wait it out.

Both of us were totally cool again before we left. Though I still think the balls were a cheap shot. He could have hit me anywhere else and it would have been cool, but not there. I mean it's not like I didn't deserve it, I did punch him in the face like Tim Treadwell punching a grizzly bear. Grizzly bears don't go for the junk though. So the lesson is, don't punch humans, punch bears.

Ever since Angel punched me I haven't heard that voice again.

Other than those fun stories, not much is happening. I have the day off of work today which I plan on enjoying. There are a lot of college basketball games today, and I'm going to watch a bunch of them. Though it does suck that Illinois was eliminated in the Big Ten Tournament by Michigan State last night. I'll pry still watch the rest of the Big Ten tournament anyway. With March Madness starting next week, it's good to scout as many teams as possible before filling out your brackets in office pools and what have you. I was hoping the Big East title game tonight would be Villanova and UConn, but since they've both been upset we have Syracuse vs Pitt. Should still be a good game, but Nova UConn would have been better.

Keepin It Real Since 1980,

Monday, March 06, 2006

Goodbye Kirby

Kirby Puckett

My Life is Baseball (Or Baseball is My Life)

Last I checked this blog was supposed to be more of a daily updated thing. Unfortunately I'm a rebel who doesn't play by the rules. I'm way too cool to get on the computer to update my blog.

Where as I wish that was true it's not. The reasons I haven't posted are simple.

  1. Work-All week at work was a pain in the ass cuz we had inventory today, and had to spend the last week preparing for it.
  2. MLB 06 The Show-This game has consumed me. If I'm not at work odds are you can find me in my Lazy Boy playing this game.

Seriously, it's kind of lame but I know a lot of you know what I'm goin through. When you buy a new video, and it's good it consumes a lot of your free time. You get kind of addicted to it. MLB 06 The Show is one of those games. I think there are other factors though. The biggest being that I don't play many video games any more. This was the first new game I bought in around 8 months. It's also the first time I even used my PS2 in about 5 months. The game is just amazing though.

It's baseball if you didn't already know, but there's a game mode that's completely sucked me in. It's the career mode where you create yourself and start a baseball career. You then go to Spring Training with a team and try to make the squad. My career was with the Pittsburgh Pirates as I tried to become a Major League catcher. I chose the Pirates randomly (I closed my eyes and pushed the button. When I took my finger off and opened my eyes it was on the Pirates. Destiny.) to simulate a "draft" type deal. I went to spring training with them and absolutely sucked. I think I hit like .221 and even though they signed me they sent me to their AAA minor league team, the Indianapolis Indians.

Now the best feature this game has for its addictive nature is the option to "fast forward" through games. You can just play your at bats if you like, which is what I do. It makes things go a lot quicker and keeps my attention better. As a result I can play the game for an hour and get through like 20 games.

Now while playing you get Training Points based on your performance and use those to boost your skills. So in a whole season at AAA Indianapolis I hit .365 with 18 HR's and 72 RBI. As soon as the International League (The minor league I was in. I love the fact this game has minor leagues.) season ended the Pirates called me up to the majors. So I played the last few weeks of the Major League season with Pittsburgh. My first game actually was at Wrigley Field against the Cubs. I went 0-3 with a walk in my debut. Anyway in the 3 weeks of Major League play i hit .314 with 0 HR's and 5 RBI.

The next season I was with the Pirates the whole season. My created player was only 19 years old at the time, but it didn't stop me from posting some very reasonable numbers. In a 162 game season I played 112 games batting .303 with 5 HR's and 59 RBI. Not the greatest numbers, but consider the fact I spent the entire season hitting in the 8th spot of the order and they look better. I was also pretty clutch hitting .369 with runners in scoring position. Now you would think that a season like that would lead to a spot on the Pirates. Not so.

I started the third year of my career the same place I started it. In Indianapolis. I spent a whole season in the Majors, and hit over .300, but I wasn't good enough for a 5th place team. So I went to the minors and in 19 games batted .534 with 5 HR's and 24 RBI.

I was quickly called back up to the Pirates. I've played like 5 games since returning to Pittsburgh and am hitting .250 with 0 HR and 2 RBI.

I know this is all VERY interesting to you, so I'll be sure to keep you all updated on my progress.

In other news I'm very sad to hear that one of my heroes growing up has suffered a stroke. Kirby Puckett, the Hall of Fame center fielder for the Minnesota Twins, had a stroke Sunday morning. He was one of my favorite players growing up. In fact while playing in Little League on the Twins an Uncle of mine (since divorced my Aunt, so no longer my Uncle!) started calling me Kirby, and did for about 10 years. Puckett also played baseball at Triton Community College in River Grove, which is where I went to school for a few years. Between the glaucoma that robbed him of the end of his career and this, Kirby is really getting the shafted. He was a great player, and is a great person and I hope he recovers. He was supposed to be getting married in the upcoming months, but now who knows.

Get Better Kirby.

Good lord my life is dominated by all things baseball right now isn't it? Need further proof? Ok. I finished reading Ball Four last week. What a terrific book. Any baseball fan has to read it. It's extremely funny, and is just a great read. Since I finished it though I've started yet another book. It's called The Glory of Their Times-The Story of the Early Days of Baseball Told by the Men Who Played It by Lawrence S. Ritter. It's a collection of a bunch of first hand narratives by baseball players from the very early era. 1890's through 1930's. I'm only about 60 pages into it, but so far I'm enjoying it. It's so weird listening to Rube Marquard describing his journey to the majors, and life once he got there, and then comparing it to the players now. Just little things like being called up from the minors to the majors, and not being able to go cuz you can't afford the train ticket, and the team won't buy you one. These days teams have hired people to wipe the player's ass for him, back then teams wouldn't even pay you to help them. I'm lookin forward to reading the rest of it.

Also last week I was reminded of a story by Kevin. He told me while we were all watching Silvio and his band Carrion Rogue play. We started talking about one time while we lived in Champaign, and we got into a fight with an entire fraternity. Well not really. Kevin, me and others were at a party, while Marty and Neil Bhandari went to this frat party with some girls they knew. Well we left our party to go get them and go somewhere, where I don't remember. Anyway Marty and Neil had gotten into some troubles with members of the frat. So being a bunch of drunk college guys we had to fight. Or at least try to. So we're all out on the front lawn of this frat house, like in West Side Story. On one side you had my friends and I, on the other side a frat (I can't remember which frat, just that we started calling it Hate-a Hate-a Hippie). Well Kevin was busy doin the big brother thing and trying to stop Marty(and pry all of us really) from getting killed. That's when he told me about something I didn't remember.

"I was physically carrying Marty away from that frat house, when, walking by your friendly conversation with one of the couple dozen frat boys, I hear, "If any of my friends here is so much as touched by any of you frat boys, I will kill YOU first." I was really torn at that moment between feelings along the lines of 'why are my brothers and friends all bent on getting beat by an entire frat tonight' and 'that might be the best pre-fight line I've ever heard in real life- even though we're about to get our asses kicked.' Of course we didn't get our asses kicked, so the line really was just awesome."

I don't remember saying it, but I don't remember a lot of things I did in Champaign. I do feel like a bad ass now though, and really, that's the only reason I even included it in this entry. Just to make sure you all know not to mess with me. Cuz I will kill you.

Keepin It Real Since 1980,