Also Penn State won the Big 10 today!!!!!!
Fuck yes bitches. Where are all those people that wanted to fire Paterno last year at now?
Later all.
Saturday, November 19, 2005
Birthdays and Big Ten Titles
Ok so I'm going out pretty soon to celebrate Silvio and The Leemer's 25th birthdays. Technally the three of us did that last night, but tonight is the "official" celebration. Gay rods. I'm going to bring my camera, and maybe I'll actually take pictures too. You never know with me cuz I'm usually too busy drinking and partying to stop and take all them purty pictures. I should hire somebody to follow me around and document my stupid life.
Also Penn State won the Big 10 today!!!!!!
Fuck yes bitches. Where are all those people that wanted to fire Paterno last year at now?
Later all.
Also Penn State won the Big 10 today!!!!!!
Fuck yes bitches. Where are all those people that wanted to fire Paterno last year at now?
Later all.
Monday, November 14, 2005
Fantasy Football Heaven/Hell
For those of you who don't know me I am a Fantasy Football owner. I love it. I love the NFL and fantasy leagues make it that much more enjoyable to me. Every year I play in a few leagues. This year has been somewhat troubling. There is one league I started with a bunch of poker buddies on ESPN. I run that league. My team will be 2-8 at the end of the night. Worst record in the league. It sucks, but I'm not that bothered by it. Things out of my control have caused me to lose, like injuries. Plus it's only $10.
Then there are the 2 leagues that mean something to me. Both are on CBS Sportsline. There is the team I share with my boy BillyB, Swamp Nutz, and my other team, Killed For Less. This is Billy and I's 5th year in the American Fantasy Football League. It's a tough year. Injury after injury is killing us. No matter what we do, it doesn't work. This week for example we entered at 3-6 but only 2 games out. We made some trades in a last ditch effort to produce victories. We got Cedric Benson for Antonio Chatman, and traded our stud Torry Holt for Joey Galloway and Jimmy Smith. The trades appeared to be working for us, at first. Cedric Benson was tearing up the 49ers defense until he had his leg rolled up on. Next thing we knew he was being carted off the field. He had already gained 50 yards, and was within scoring range at the time, and appeared to be just warming up. Yet again we were bitten by the injury bug. Jonathan Wells a midweek pick up off the waiver wire worked out for us. He started for our original RB Domanick Davis who didn't play DUE TO INJURY this week. He got 75 yards and a TD for us. So that worked. Joey Galloway joined are team and showed us why we wanted him right away collecting 131 yards and a TD. Awesome. Byron Leftwich, our backup QB, showed why we drafted him to use on Drew Brees' bye by throwing a long TD score as well. Another move I made during the week was picking up Kicker Matt Stover. Our kickers were both stuck on disappointing offenses and not scoring. Matt Stover has been the Ravens entire offense this year and has racked up a decent amount of points. Points were at a premium for us, especially in this win or our seasons done week. So I tried something. I put Stover in and took Ryan Longwell out. Result? Stover scored 4 points. Longwell scored 21. We lose. All that shit we did during the week and we lose on that? Fuck you fantasy football.
Now this brings me to Killed for Less. I bought this team in a league full of people I don't know. It cost $40. (Swamp Nutz is $125 a season.) Killed for Less is the complete opposite of Swamp Nutz. I can do absolutely no wrong in this league. I have a stacked roster, and am by far the highest scoring team in the league. Of the 10 weeks (including this week) played so far I have been the high scorer 7 times. As a result I sit at 8-2 with a comfy lead in my division. This week though I figured to suffer a letdown. My main beast Ladainian Tomlinson was on the bye, along with my other starting Running back Rudi Johnson also being off. So I had to pick up to RB's off the scrap heap to fill in. I was fully prepared to lose. I got Greg Jones of the Jacksonville Jaguars and Samkon Gado from the Packers. Result? Jones 19 points, Gado 28. See what I'm talking about? I can start my mother at QB next week and she will somehow find a way to get me at least 25 points.
It's totally frustrating to me. I'm not even enjoying the fact that Killed For Less is killing people cuz of Swamp Nutz. Swamp Nutz is and always will be the one of my teams that truly matters to me. Now I have to deal with basically just playing out the string in these last 4 games. Bill and I aren't gonna quit, and were not gonna try to lose on purpose so we can get first pick next year. We're gonna do everything we can to win and try to fuck up somebody else's season. That's all we can do. Killed For Less will probably go on to win the championship in my other league, and don't get me wrong, that would be nice. Just not as nice as a victory for Swamp Nutz would have been.
Then there are the 2 leagues that mean something to me. Both are on CBS Sportsline. There is the team I share with my boy BillyB, Swamp Nutz, and my other team, Killed For Less. This is Billy and I's 5th year in the American Fantasy Football League. It's a tough year. Injury after injury is killing us. No matter what we do, it doesn't work. This week for example we entered at 3-6 but only 2 games out. We made some trades in a last ditch effort to produce victories. We got Cedric Benson for Antonio Chatman, and traded our stud Torry Holt for Joey Galloway and Jimmy Smith. The trades appeared to be working for us, at first. Cedric Benson was tearing up the 49ers defense until he had his leg rolled up on. Next thing we knew he was being carted off the field. He had already gained 50 yards, and was within scoring range at the time, and appeared to be just warming up. Yet again we were bitten by the injury bug. Jonathan Wells a midweek pick up off the waiver wire worked out for us. He started for our original RB Domanick Davis who didn't play DUE TO INJURY this week. He got 75 yards and a TD for us. So that worked. Joey Galloway joined are team and showed us why we wanted him right away collecting 131 yards and a TD. Awesome. Byron Leftwich, our backup QB, showed why we drafted him to use on Drew Brees' bye by throwing a long TD score as well. Another move I made during the week was picking up Kicker Matt Stover. Our kickers were both stuck on disappointing offenses and not scoring. Matt Stover has been the Ravens entire offense this year and has racked up a decent amount of points. Points were at a premium for us, especially in this win or our seasons done week. So I tried something. I put Stover in and took Ryan Longwell out. Result? Stover scored 4 points. Longwell scored 21. We lose. All that shit we did during the week and we lose on that? Fuck you fantasy football.
Now this brings me to Killed for Less. I bought this team in a league full of people I don't know. It cost $40. (Swamp Nutz is $125 a season.) Killed for Less is the complete opposite of Swamp Nutz. I can do absolutely no wrong in this league. I have a stacked roster, and am by far the highest scoring team in the league. Of the 10 weeks (including this week) played so far I have been the high scorer 7 times. As a result I sit at 8-2 with a comfy lead in my division. This week though I figured to suffer a letdown. My main beast Ladainian Tomlinson was on the bye, along with my other starting Running back Rudi Johnson also being off. So I had to pick up to RB's off the scrap heap to fill in. I was fully prepared to lose. I got Greg Jones of the Jacksonville Jaguars and Samkon Gado from the Packers. Result? Jones 19 points, Gado 28. See what I'm talking about? I can start my mother at QB next week and she will somehow find a way to get me at least 25 points.
It's totally frustrating to me. I'm not even enjoying the fact that Killed For Less is killing people cuz of Swamp Nutz. Swamp Nutz is and always will be the one of my teams that truly matters to me. Now I have to deal with basically just playing out the string in these last 4 games. Bill and I aren't gonna quit, and were not gonna try to lose on purpose so we can get first pick next year. We're gonna do everything we can to win and try to fuck up somebody else's season. That's all we can do. Killed For Less will probably go on to win the championship in my other league, and don't get me wrong, that would be nice. Just not as nice as a victory for Swamp Nutz would have been.
Saturday, November 12, 2005
What the Dilly?
Where have I been? What have I been doing? Nowhere. Nothing. I knew getting old was a bitch, but is it supposed to happen this quickly? I swear to God that ever since I quit smoking I've actually seen my health decline. I had some sort of weird stomach thing goin on earlier this week that was totally fucking with my stomach. All the subsequent trips to the bathroom proceeded to dehydrate my system leaving me with lovely headaches and stuff. I didn't miss a minute of work through all this mind you. Now that I got over that though I've been having these weird pains in my head. It's like a kind of odd pressure in my forehead. I feel it when I stand up, or bend over or just move. Hell if I get wide eyed I feel it. It's not like "Ow!" pain, as much as pressure. Kinda like when you wake up really hungover, and your head is throbbing. Think of that throbbing, but not continuous. Just a lil at a time every once in a while. I say it's an anuerysm and I'm due to die any second, Panger says it's sinuses. We all know how competitive I can be, and I plan on winning this argument God dammit.
Donna drunk dialed me the other night and left me a voicemail. I called her back and left her a voicemail. We've been playing phonetag ever since. I really was happy to hear from her cuz I had'nt in a while and she is one of my Top 3 People of all time. Now if I could only TALK to her.
@ray texted me this afternoon while I was at work with
I replied with
I have a huge game tomorrow in my main fantasy football league. For those who don't know my boy BillyB and I own a team called Swamp Nutz. At this point were 3-6, but only 2 games out of first place. We just pulled off some trades this week that we hope will do SOMETHING, ANYTHING to help us win. First we sent Antonio Chatman packing to the Victimizers (Vic LeBron) for Cedric Benson. We needed an RB this week, well any week cuz the ones we've had this year just suck. Plus he's a Bear so I'm rooting for him twice. Then in a big, and somewhat risky trade we got rid of fantasy stud Torry Holt. Ya he was like our entire offense when he was healthy but man do we need depth. So we sent him to the Kingsmen (Mike King) for 2 WR's Joey Galloway and Jimmy Smith. Jimmy Smith has an extra bonus in that he's on the same team as our QB Byron Leftwich, so if they hook up for some TD's this week it's 2 times the points for us. Of course Drew Brees will be our starting QB again starting next week. If we lose this week I think it's safe to say we can start preparing for next season's draft.
Ya that's about it at this point.
Keepin It Real Since 1980,
Tom
Donna drunk dialed me the other night and left me a voicemail. I called her back and left her a voicemail. We've been playing phonetag ever since. I really was happy to hear from her cuz I had'nt in a while and she is one of my Top 3 People of all time. Now if I could only TALK to her.
@ray texted me this afternoon while I was at work with
"Tom, how do I get out of detox?"
I replied with
"Either sober up or startI'm not sure what he did, but he is out of detox now. I'm completely shocked this is his first time.
digging."
I have a huge game tomorrow in my main fantasy football league. For those who don't know my boy BillyB and I own a team called Swamp Nutz. At this point were 3-6, but only 2 games out of first place. We just pulled off some trades this week that we hope will do SOMETHING, ANYTHING to help us win. First we sent Antonio Chatman packing to the Victimizers (Vic LeBron) for Cedric Benson. We needed an RB this week, well any week cuz the ones we've had this year just suck. Plus he's a Bear so I'm rooting for him twice. Then in a big, and somewhat risky trade we got rid of fantasy stud Torry Holt. Ya he was like our entire offense when he was healthy but man do we need depth. So we sent him to the Kingsmen (Mike King) for 2 WR's Joey Galloway and Jimmy Smith. Jimmy Smith has an extra bonus in that he's on the same team as our QB Byron Leftwich, so if they hook up for some TD's this week it's 2 times the points for us. Of course Drew Brees will be our starting QB again starting next week. If we lose this week I think it's safe to say we can start preparing for next season's draft.
Ya that's about it at this point.
Keepin It Real Since 1980,
Tom
Monday, November 07, 2005
Sick
Sorry I haven't written anything. No wait, I'm not sorry. Anyway I'm pretty sick right now. I've spent the majority of the last 2 days either in bed or in the bathroom. I didn't do too much this weekend because of it.
I'd love to go on some long brilliant rant that is typical of me (hahahaha) but it hurts to think right now. My brain is throbbing, and I'm dehydrated so you will get nothing from me. I will be staying home tonight and watching Monday Night Football. I got $20 riding on it. Ya, Im a baller.
Hope you all don't feel as shitty as I do right now.
Keepin It Real Since 1980,
Tom
I'd love to go on some long brilliant rant that is typical of me (hahahaha) but it hurts to think right now. My brain is throbbing, and I'm dehydrated so you will get nothing from me. I will be staying home tonight and watching Monday Night Football. I got $20 riding on it. Ya, Im a baller.
Hope you all don't feel as shitty as I do right now.
Keepin It Real Since 1980,
Tom
Wednesday, November 02, 2005
Mindfreaks
So last night I watched an episode of that Criss Angel Mindfreak on A&E. Vic had been talkin about it all night at work so I figured I'd check it out. It was ok. It was kinda cool that Korn was on it. If you don't know who Criss Angel is don't worry, I didn't either until yesterday. He's a magician, or illusionist or whatever the fuck it is that those guys call themselves these days. He did some pretty cool tricks last night but Vic assures me that I saw nothing last night compared to what he normally does. Well I guess I'm just gonna have to watch again then ain't I?
Speaking of Mindfreaks. There is a new trend in Hollywood these days, and it's not Kabballah. No it's insanity. Take for instance Rocky Balboa aka John Rambo aka Stop or His Mom Will Shoot. Sylvester Stallone is planning on making a Rocky VI. I beg you Mr. Stallone please don't. Don't tarnish the legacy that is the brilliance they call Rocky V. Is Sly that desperate to be famous again? Has he thrown away all his money or something on new plastic for his face?
Remember me? I used to be somebody.
Did anyone see Rocky V? Remember how god awful it was? Exactly. Why does anyone feel there is a need for a sixth Rocky? How could they? It's sad. Sly's insanity pales in comparison to our next Mindfreak.
HUH?!
Saddam? Is that you? Wait a minute....MEL GIBSON!? What the fuck happened to you? What's this about some new movie you plan on working on, its called Apocalypto? What the hell is that about?
"What I'm doing is making an action-adventure film of mythic proportions."
All right sounds cool. Until you get to the part that the whole thing is going to be done in a Mayan dialect thats been dead for hundreds of years. Also it will star a bunch of Mexican actors nobody has ever heard of. Sound like a familiar formula? It's a lot like Mel's last project The Passion of the Christ. There is one large difference Mel forgot to take into account though. A majority of the people who go see movies on this planet are Christian. So they are willing to go see a movie about Christ even if it's in a language they don't understand cuz it's a story they already know. Something tells me that there just aren't enough Mayan's left on the planet who are going to be to into this. At least Mel is financing this thing on his own.
Fuck the movie though Mel, SHAVE. Look at you. How much poon tang are you losing out on now with that look? What happened to Riggs man? He got any damn chick he wanted. None of the ladies are gonna wanna sleep with you now. Ya you are still Mel Gibson but you don't look like Mel Gibson. I can get more action than you right now. Seriously Mel come back down to Earth. Either straighten up and fly right or I'm gonna tell Panger that the next time she sees you to run you down in her Mini Cooper. (Don't even get me started on those god damn cars.)
Ok I'm gonna go watch some more Criss Angel Mindfreak now. Maybe he can make Sly and Mel disappear.
Later,
Tom
Speaking of Mindfreaks. There is a new trend in Hollywood these days, and it's not Kabballah. No it's insanity. Take for instance Rocky Balboa aka John Rambo aka Stop or His Mom Will Shoot. Sylvester Stallone is planning on making a Rocky VI. I beg you Mr. Stallone please don't. Don't tarnish the legacy that is the brilliance they call Rocky V. Is Sly that desperate to be famous again? Has he thrown away all his money or something on new plastic for his face?
Remember me? I used to be somebody.
Did anyone see Rocky V? Remember how god awful it was? Exactly. Why does anyone feel there is a need for a sixth Rocky? How could they? It's sad. Sly's insanity pales in comparison to our next Mindfreak.
HUH?!
Saddam? Is that you? Wait a minute....MEL GIBSON!? What the fuck happened to you? What's this about some new movie you plan on working on, its called Apocalypto? What the hell is that about?
"What I'm doing is making an action-adventure film of mythic proportions."
All right sounds cool. Until you get to the part that the whole thing is going to be done in a Mayan dialect thats been dead for hundreds of years. Also it will star a bunch of Mexican actors nobody has ever heard of. Sound like a familiar formula? It's a lot like Mel's last project The Passion of the Christ. There is one large difference Mel forgot to take into account though. A majority of the people who go see movies on this planet are Christian. So they are willing to go see a movie about Christ even if it's in a language they don't understand cuz it's a story they already know. Something tells me that there just aren't enough Mayan's left on the planet who are going to be to into this. At least Mel is financing this thing on his own.
Fuck the movie though Mel, SHAVE. Look at you. How much poon tang are you losing out on now with that look? What happened to Riggs man? He got any damn chick he wanted. None of the ladies are gonna wanna sleep with you now. Ya you are still Mel Gibson but you don't look like Mel Gibson. I can get more action than you right now. Seriously Mel come back down to Earth. Either straighten up and fly right or I'm gonna tell Panger that the next time she sees you to run you down in her Mini Cooper. (Don't even get me started on those god damn cars.)
Ok I'm gonna go watch some more Criss Angel Mindfreak now. Maybe he can make Sly and Mel disappear.
Later,
Tom
SUPER PISSED
I just typed a great entry and when I went to post it it came back "Cannot find server" and I lost the whole fucking thing. Maybe I'll retype it tonight but I don't have the time now. All I know is I'm fucking pissed off.
Later,
Tom
Later,
Tom
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