Thursday, June 29, 2006

In Case You Hadn't Noticed

I've redone the look here at Keepin It Real Since 1980.

Why?

I have no fucking idea.

Instead of sticking to that though, let's just say that Keepin It Real Since 1980 (The kids call it KIRS1980) is moving in a new direction. Which direction that is exactly, I'm not sure, but I am sure that it will totally kick ass.

I think I'm gonna go less day to day life stuff, and more humor stuff. I also have held back in the past on expletives, and other crass things of that nature. Then I had to ask myself,

"Is that keepin it real?"

The simple answer is no.

The detailed answer is HELL no.

So beware readers. Here is a list of things you can probably expect to start seeing here in the future.
  • Cuss words. Tons of em too. Not just shit, damn, or asshole. I'm talking fuck, motherfucker, cocksucker, twat, and even the c word, cunt. If you have a problem with this, deal with it. If you are a member of my family, well too fucking bad.
  • Nudity. Boobies, boobies boobies. I'm not gonna go porn site or anything, but there have been tons of magnificent pictures of the day I've had to pass on cuz of nudity. No more.
  • Rants. Tons of fucking rants. About anything and everything. Rants that make absolutely no sense as you are reading them, but 3 weeks later you'll be walking down the street and it will hit you. "Holy shit! Tom was right!!" No shit I was right. I'm always right.
  • Other shit. I think that's self explanatory.

So strap that ever expanding ass of yours into that chair and get ready for the ride of your life.

*************

I wrote about a week ago that I thought Ozzie Guillen should be fined and suspended for calling Chicago Sun-Times columnist "a fucking fag." Ever since I have had to read about this every fucking day in every fucking newspaper. I get Jay Mariotti saying how he doesn't want to be the story, yet for like 4 days following this every single god damn column Mariotti wrote was about Guillen.

Mark Cuban wrote a pretty good entry on his blog the other day about what bullshit all of this is.

Everybody's talking about how Ozzie Guillen and Mark Cuban make themselves the story. Nevermind the fact that the media constantly asks them questions about these incidents daily, or during the NBA Finals ABC put Cuban on the camera every 5 minutes.

It's Guillen and Cuban who make themselves the story though.

That's not my problem though, I just thought Cuban made a good point. My problem is this. All week everybody has gotten their panties in a bunch because Ozzie called another man a fag. Personally I'm called a fag, or call someone else a fag at least 3 times a day. We all do. The truth is that fag has become a part of the American lexicon, but not for what most people think. The word has evolved more so that it means sissy, punk, or baby. It's generally not even used as an anti-gay slur anymore. At least not in my circles. When I wanna call somebody gay, I usually say, "Dude you're gay." or "You're such a homo."

So really while Ozzie shouldn't have said it, it's not cuz it's such a horrible word as much as it's terribly un-PC.

Apparently though it's ok to punch your wife in the face at a bar and then drag her around by her hair.

Just ask Phillies pitcher Brett Myers.
He did it last week, in front of about 15-20 people.

Why is it that they mentioned this on SportsCenter and other sports programs for about 5 seconds before going back to more "expert" discussion on Ozzie Guillen and how "muy muy loco" he is?

Why isn't anybody calling for Myers to be suspended? Fined?

Now I'm not Johnnie Cochran but I may have to play the race card here. If Myers were black or latino there would probably be a large uproar.

Now yesterday it was reported that Myers is officially taking a leave of absence to deal with personal matters. So even if the Phillies really did suspend him, THEY CAN'T JUST COME OUT AND SAY IT. No they have to protect this asshole wife beater.

And what are these personal matters he has to deal with? Has Mrs. Myers not learned her lesson yet? Does he need to finish the job? Ozzie Guillen says fag and he has to undergo sensitivity training. Myers beats the hell out of his wife and he needs time to collect his thoughts.

So I guess the lesson here is watch what you say, but beat what you will.

It's all a fucking joke.

Keepin It Real Since 1980,

Tom

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

What! No Boobies???

I was promised boobies, damnit!

Boobies! Boobies! Boobies!

Fornelli said...

You write a whole entry on something of substance and all anybody notices is that there may possibly be boobies on here someday.

My readers ladies and gentleman.